For anyone going through awakening, expansions and upgrades of consciousness can be very big business for us, physically and on all levels of our being. These states can make us fragile. 

They are pesky and demanding.

They can pull us out of the flow of our everyday life.

Sometimes we wish we could simply say “Not now!”

As someone who has been actively on the awakening path for more than thirty years, I have had my fair share of fragile times when I have been pulled out of whatever I thought was important, to sit surrendered at the feet of whatever consciousness, my soul, the deepening or expansion itself thought was important. 

And not always humbly!

It has taken me many years to really work out what I need to do, and how I need to care for myself in times when awakening makes me fragile. Times when things are being broken down to be rebuilt, things being emptied out to be filled up. Consciousness is pouring in, restructuring and making it possible to orient around it, with everything coming together in a new higher frequency that is just right.

When it all comes together again, it is amazing, magical, transformative.

There are new perspectives, symptoms and sufferings that disappear never to return and new vistas available for the sometimes grumpy personality dragged along with it. 

I have learned that being fragile is actually being powerful. It takes strength and courage and an enormous inner space of the heart, to allow our systems and potentially our defenses, our aura, our mind and our hearts to soften or open, to surrender or break apart in order for the new to birth.

While our inner critic can take the sledgehammer to us for ‘allowing’ fragility, the soul knows that it takes huge trust, great courage and enormous inner strength, to hold space for the fragility of change. 

Here are some tips on how I approach fragility in case you find yourself here, and I imagine you will be here beside me at various points of the journey.

• Most important is my attitude, understanding and knowledge of fragility. I have come to accept its purpose and have witnessed the sometimes microscopic thoroughness of the cleansing and healing that takes place during fragility.

I know that fragility caused by awakening always brings boons and grace, and it also requires me to face it anew. That each evolution of fragility must be met simultaneously from a place of the unknown
I don’t know what it will ask of me, what it will take from me, what it will perform on my behalf and what it will leave me with when deposited back on the shore of my everyday self. I don’t know what it will elevate in me. 

• Holding space for myself and the process: this is really important. I create a container for myself like the caterpillar goes into a cocoon. It is an energetic container and a space of permission and deep, deep love because sometimes I need a ferocious self-love to get through upgrades driven by awakening.

I have to love myself through everything the mainstream, other people, and external critics may pull up against me in all the ways that potentially I may be ‘failing’ during this period of fragility.

In the early phases of awakening this was tough because I was very driven to perform in the world. These days I feel that I am happily my own protector of times of fragility because I am able to join with the process in devotion to the outcome that I cannot yet see, and the fact that my soul is singularly pointed toward self-realization. 

Questions to ask yourself: 

How can I be my own protector?
What do I need to hold space for myself?
How do I truly take my own side in this process?
How do I tune out the outer noise to make space for what wants to be? 

What is truly needed in this moment to moment of “now”? 

• Withdrawing from the world: At times of fragility, to sustain awakening and ascension, requires us to withdraw from the world. Sometimes days or hours, sometimes weeks, months or even years. 

For those who are going through the shorter periods of fragility in some ways they can be more challenging, you are in the world, working long hours, raising a family, and sometimes you feel you are slipping out of that world into something deeper and more mysterious and you find yourself increasingly unavailable. You break down crying, everything is overwhelming, life is too much! Because the structures that allowed you to sustain your life in that way are temporarily collapsing so you can live it from a higher level of consciousness.Finding ways to support yourself, even an inner permission, during times of fragility is very important. If you have a very full life, the ten minutes before you get out of bed or ten minutes before you get into it may be all you have to offer this process of fragility. (Or the 20 minutes in the car after school drop-off!) Whereas some may be able to lie on the couch for periods of time, or lie in the sunshine. 

Let yourself withdraw in any way possible. It is OK. We need to be able to disentangle from things that hold us in a rigid way and style of operating so that something else can emerge.

You have to sometimes make space for a temporary collapse. Deep exhaustion. An inability to perform or have anything to “give”.

• Distraction: Sometimes if the transformative process is really intense, distraction is very helpful, it gives you time to take your mind off the process, often our mind gets in the way of trying to work things out when there is nothing to work out at all. It is helpful to just let it happen, and surrender to the process. 

Distraction can be anything from sitting in the garden to reading a book, or eyes closed lying on the earth, to watching back-to-back episodes of a TV series. Netflix can be very supportive for the awakening process – for the fragile body, for the energetically exhausted system, for the bamboozled mind – because it is working so hard, all your system can do is give you a little bit of energy to watch Netflix! Don’t be hard on yourself. Sometimes I have got through some pretty rugged awakenings with a good dose of TV! 

Be mindful of what you are ingesting, you will be sensitive to vibrations of violence and difficult emotions and it may be wise to shield yourself from them. Comedies and light fare can be quite helpful.

• Permission to be in an altered state. Often when we are fragile from awakening transformations, we can be in altered states, very fuzzy, very foggy or otherworldly, or feel like we are barely here. Sometimes it is because we have gone out of our body to allow our body the time and space to heal.

During such times the mind itself and the many levels of the mind are healing deeply, often purging and emptying out, so it is quite normal for the mind to be altered, for consciousness to be fuzzy or unable to focus. 

• Remembering the supports you are familiar with. Self-care. The methods and memories you already have, that you know are there for you. Nature. Four leggeds. Nourishing food. Cozy blankets and shawls to snuggle under.

One thing that I have learned when I am extremely exhausted is how to make good, healing food that requires minimal effort because sometimes I am too spent to do much cooking. I will make a big pot of soup with premade stock. Vegetables and stock, blended with herbs. Smoothies and tea, green vegetables, the basics.

I fully acknowledge that sometimes doing those simple things feels like climbing a mountain. Create routines for yourself and ways of signalling to those around you that you are going through a transformational shift and you just need some time and some space. 

• Integration: When fragility begins to fade as the upgrade stabilizes the most important thing is to allow space for integration. This may be more rest, lying or walking in nature, good food, spiritual practice, yoga, or whatever your intuitive knowing calls to you. I work deeply with my spirit team to integrate all of the changes and all of the new structures that are coming online so that I can maximize the positive outcome. My spirit team is with me holding and supporting me throughout the transformative process, and sometimes I use my Spirit Magic tool kit to help me out as well.

Honor integration. It is an important phase that will allow the new to consolidate and become your new foundation. Tune into the newness, the deepened awareness, the freedom from suffering and whatever else has arrived. Begin to know it.

• Return to the world. To be honest, as an Aries, returning to the world, I put the burners on, because I cannot wait to be back there again! Seeing my friends and family, doing my work without the burden of the fatigue of fragility! It is my tendency to be Woohoo! I am out of here!

At the same time, it is important for me to appreciate what I have been through, to respect and honor my resilience even if it did not look like it at the time, and to appreciate my courage to care enough about awakening to put it first. 

“Well done, Spirit! Well done, God! Well done, Universe! Well done to the mysterious design of life on this planet! Well done ME!”

I make mental notes of new strategies that help me through, or new learnings, because I guarantee you that I will get back into life so fast, that I will forget out of sheer relief, what I have just endured until sometime in the future fragility  nags at me again and I recognize that another transformative tunnel has just appeared and once again, that familiar part of me is going “Nooooo!!” 😱

How does fragility appear to you? 

What helps you through it and what have you too birthed from it. Please share in the comments below. I honor your soul warriors!