I vomited up social media a few weeks ago, literally!
I threw it up violently in my Airbnb kitchen sink while magnificent ancient fir and oak trees waved tenderly above me.
Here’s what happened and why it happened below minus gory pictures of the sink. Plus I am outlining the big changes, business risks and experiments I am making in order to be more in alignment with my soul, and my Human Design type.
Curious? Let’s go!
I had been geeking out on human design and decided to make 2022 the year of my human design generator business experiment.
During my research, I started implementing what I was learning. As I came deeper into alignment with myself, the thing that stood out was how much I was in a profound hate relationship with social media. It really made me unhappy like nothing else in my life. Normally, I don’t allow things that make me that miserable to stay. But it used to be a source of joy and fun so I persisted.
I had been showing up in social media less and less because all the original joy I had had since 2013 had disappeared and drained away in the last 18 months with all the changes on the platform. And this was multiplied by receiving social media training that simply made me a stressed-out introvert.
I hated all the logarithm manipulation, the change from Insta to a video platform. I love the pictures, as sensitive videos are usually too much for me, unless they are of cats! I also sensed the demand by the Meta powers that be to demand that I make reels and be a video producer to succeed. I no longer had fun there.
The only thing I loved about Insta was connecting to my beautiful community. They are the best thing about it.
For me, if Facebook was a kid on the playground, none of us would be playing with him or her. Our pure child instincts would tell us that kid was bad for us. So, why was I still playing with the tyrant child?
I wanted to quit with every cell in my being.
I curled up on the sofa and I put social media in big purple texta on my “2022 quit list” and sat back. “Well done Myree!” I thought.
Unexpectedly and suddenly, my soul came forward and gave me an abrupt download and ass kick.
It surprisingly told me to absolutely stay on social media. In fact, it gave me very strict orders to turn my social media accounts into a “portal of love”. I was astonished.
Here is some of what it told me:
“Stay on there”.
“BE Loving on there”
“Let this LOVE speak through the posts, that is it.”
“If it is an outpouring of love, you will love it”.
“Allow your Instagram to be a channel of the vessel of love, a very particular kind of love. Channel the SOURCE OF LOVE”.
It went on giving me extremely explicit instructions, on the source of love, what to do and how to show up… this is simply a flavour of its instructions.
As I felt my soul and its wisdom, the commands channelling through me, I felt enormous waves of energy leaving my body. Instant healing.
The toxicity of socials, Facebook and in particular Instagram, was pouring out of my body. The impact of going against myself in order to “succeed” (how can such behaviour be a success?) started to move and release.
Suddenly I felt an intense wave of nausea and realised, OMG I am going to throw up.
I jumped up and started running to the bathroom, my spirit team told me “you won’t make it, head for the kitchen”.
So, there I was, heaving in the sink, feeling bad because it was not my sink, and sensing wave after wave of all the toxic energy, emotions and training I had ever received about social media and from being on social media itself leaving me.
Leaving were values and ways of being on Insta that I had I paid a lot of money to be trained in.
Gone was wave after wave of self-hatred that I had absorbed from the field just being on the platform.
Gone was the energetics of manipulation the Social Media giants inflict upon us all.
Gone was all the pressure I put on myself to succeed there anymore.
On it went until I was simply heaving air but the poison kept flowing out.
Afterwards I cleansed myself and scrubbed the sink with disinfectant then returned, weak and triumphant, to the couch. I knew my life had just profoundly changed.
The next step was to heal and see if I had the courage to follow my badass soul’s guidance.
I am a healer; I heal at the soul level. I know to be healthy you cannot go against your soul. I know I have no choice but to do this.
So, it will be an experiment. I might last a few weeks, I might fail, I might hate it, I might love it. Who knows? I will follow my soul’s inspirations. Ultimately I am curious as to what I will learn.
So here are my personal rules for this experiment:
- I will only post when I feel like it.
- I don’t care about the logarithm and if barely anyone sees my posts that is ok. I am doing this experiment for me and on behalf of my soul. It is not about likes, follows, shares or feeding the Instagram machine with a diet it likes. I am not seeking success on Insta, I am seeking alignment with my soul, then I simply see what happens next.
- I will listen to my sacral response, my gut brain “yes” or “no” about everything to do with Instagram and socials. Everything, “yes” from there on first and foremost anchors my choices.
- I am only on socials to post, respond to comments and connect to my community. I will not be scrolling, searching or hanging out there. So do not be upset if I disappear in this way. I spent weeks off social media and I totally loved it.
- I will have no agenda other than this, and sharing the love in my life and work and this source of love as it arises, and other people’s love too.
Here are my rules for what I will do on social media:
- My socials will be a “portal of love”. It will channel high frequency, new love vibes and healing and love onto the planet through these accounts.
- I will only post with and from love. Period.
- I will commune with this “source of love” and get to know it, then post from it as inspired.
- I will create a new look for socials that feels more aligned to this and take out all the noise and everything that does not feel right. Clean, simple, elegant. Calm.
- I will simply be me.
Am I excited about this? Kind of.
Nervous as hell? Yes.
I really don’t know what I’m doing.
To stand so publicly for love in this way is over my edge. But why?
I don’t know why I am so edged out, because I am all about love (incarnation cross). But this is somehow new for me in a way I cannot name.
I am uncomfortable and driving into the unknown and crafting from there. It may also turn out that Instagram is not attuned to be the right platform for a deeply love oriented offering.
You can follow my experiment on Insta with me, let me know how I’m doing there and in the comments below.
I will report back to you on how this crazy wisdom from my soul and its requests to be so public go.
At the least I know just doing this is in alignment and alignment always creates magic.
Follow me for my sometimes-weekly missives here.