“Will waking up destroy my personality? After Kundalini ends, will I end up a blank nobody? I’m really so scared of this.”
Does this resonate? Does the idea of awakening make you anxious?
This is one of the most common, fearful questions I’m asked when I support people going through awakening.
To the mind, the death of the personality equals “total extinction.” And that is terrifying.
First, I want to reassure you that it’s natural to fear that awakening is going to destroy, annihilate or devastate your personality. This fear is amplified because you’re moving towards an awakening shift and a readjustment of “you”—a radical alteration in the central reference point of who you are—that is impossible to imagine accurately until it actually happens. Awakening can only be known as only a lived experience. Until then it remains an unknown, and can feel like impending death.
The truth is your personality does not get obliterated at all. In fact, what happens is entirely the opposite.
Your personality is unleashed. It is released. Completely.
Your personality remains intact—all through the fundamental and radical shift of awakening.
And then something amazing happens…
Your personality becomes the stained-glass window through which the light and consciousness of pure awareness shines out into the world.
Your personality becomes the beautiful pattern and colour and form you give to your unique expression of awakening.
Your personality becomes the clothing your awakened awareness wears as it dances through the world.
One of the most beautiful things about awakening is that the personality becomes liberated from the constraints, control and strategies of ego. It’s freed from all the ways you’ve conditioned, restricted or adapted it to fit into the external world or the demands of others.
You leave behind all the times you’ve attempted to be someone else, all the things you think you “should” be, and all the ways you haven’t been able or allowed to be yourself. And that feels so good and fun. Because the more your personality is freed up to be more authentically who you are, the more playful, more joyous, more radiant you get to be. Life is much simpler, much more joyous and easeful.
I love the way my personality has evolved and unfolded through the post-awakening integration and expansion, and how it continues to do so.
So what does that look like?
Well, I have more and more fun simply being me. And this is immediately so much more enjoyable and easeful for those around me.
My personality is a doorway through which I shine the infinite love and generosity of awakening upon and for others.
And one of the most significant and unexpected things that’s happened to me is the liberation of a really beautiful sense of humor—the emergence of a natural playfulness and the delight of radical joyousness that I didn’t have before.
And as I remain dedicated to the everlasting task of staying close and aligned to the movement of awareness, clearing any blockages, staying alert and present, the sacred clothing of my personality becomes ever more radiant.
It is a gorgeous thing to witness the personality becoming the window of both your pure awakened awareness and the beauty of your soul.
I hope this supports you to surrender with more ease as the journey of awakening carries you closer and closer to radical union with who you really are.
I’d love to hear how your personality has emerged or changed in your awakening and kundalini journey. Please share your thoughts below.
Curious to explore and integrate all the blessings of awakening: bliss, joy, contentment, satisfaction, freedom and the truth of who you are?
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